Words speak louder than actions. True! My words spoke louder and also slapped me back. Yes! The wise men did say it right- Never do things when you are drunk. Well! I jumped into a trap I made. I was foolish to break my own heart.
My excitement increased when I spilled my feelings out. I called him. He didn't pick the call. But it didn't hurt me when a female voice spoke," Hi, he isn't here." It hurt me more when I could hear his voice clearly from the background. He was talking about me, " Ah! That girl again! I don't understand why is she so clingy?" I was disappointed. I shouldn't have done all this drama to hear him say that.
Disappointment and heartbroken, I continued with the party. I pretended I was alright. But I wasn't deep inside. I truly loved him. But it was my mistake I didn't let it go of my feelings for him. He was still special for me.
I fell down. I got up. I rubbed the dirt out off my soiled soul. I continued with my life with a broken heart. I concentrated on other relationships ,career and writing. Though first two didn't help in erasing my pain. But writing was medicine to my wounded heart.
Pressure in work, relationship breakdown and depression was common to me. It didn't hurt me. I was unaffected by them. I kept myself busy with life. I didn't wanted to get involved with thoughts about him.
Life had become boring and monotonous. Nothing amazed me. I didn't enjoy life like I used to. I was like a zombie. My mum smelled something fishy going on with me. So did the whole family.
(To be continued)
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