Tuesday 1 October 2013

Mi amor-part 3

Gosh! I did feel isolated and misfit ever since I had arrived. I had never ventured out or tried to meet my friends until Shaggy had pulled me out of my peaceful four walled confinement. The reason was obviously clear. I didn’t want to face the bitter truth- my ex flame.

I had come to California to mend my broken heart. I did move on and achieved a lot in my life. But my dreaded past…never left me behind. I was still in love with Ashish. When I heard he was getting married, I felt insecurity crawling within me. Why was I feeling insecure? I thought that I had kept this behind.

I felt Shaggy shaking my elbow hard. “ Stop dreaming! I was asking you something! Why are you so lost?”, he said loudly. “ Nothing!” I argued. Shaggy and I knew it was a lie.  But he didn’t try to probe into the matter. He knew that I would go mad if he asked me more question about my mood. He kept quiet.
We had our last drink. The day would have ended perfectly if Ashish hadn’t met us. God has different plans set aside for us and these plans are always deviant from your expectations.

“ Hi Leela! What a pleasant surprise! I heard you came here last week. How’s life?”, my chirpy cousin cum Ashish’s fiance said. “ Everything’s fine. You are getting married? “ I said in ironic tone. “ Yes ! We are getting married in a month. And you my lil sister… you are not going to miss my wedding! You have to be there to help us get through with the celebrations.”, she said. I nodded like a dumb girl. I brought a smile on my face to let her believe that I was part of her happiness.

I looked at Ashish face. He was as usual the same person. His cold exterior disguised his warm heart. No one knew him better than him. But all of sudden he seemed a stranger that my cousin chose to be her soul mate. He looked back at me as if no past existed between us. 

I controlled my tears with all my strength. How could anyone be so mean? Did I not matter to him? Why was he ignoring me? Did he still love me? Was he scared that if he saw me, the past feelings would resurface?

Huh! What was I thinking? Who cares about his feelings? He was a past and I wouldn’t let his presence spoil my future.

We bid them goodbye and left the place. As I hired an auto , Shaggy asked me a question out of blue, “ So who was that guy? Do you know him?” “ Oh come on! He’s my cousin’s fiance! What are you? Deaf! She was screaming on the top of her voice- he’s my fiance.” I scolded him. “ Cousin fiance! But it looked like as if he was yours. I mean the way you were staring at him.” he said.

“ I … I… Why ? Cant I stare at a guy for a long time without reason?” I lied.  How did he do that? He read my mind so easily. I wish I knew my heart and mind so well like him.


(To be continued)

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