Consensual- Part 8

I had no courage to ask what was going on. Hey! I knew what was going to happen. I was going to be doomed for the sin I did. I knew dad would send me to faraway place where I would learn to stay within my boundaries. Mother was not going to talk to me for some time.  People would talk about me and disorient the news about me. Praveen! What would happen to him? He was going to be in wrong limelight because of me. I hate that!

I sat alone in my room. I was forbidden to have any contact from outside world. The only people I ever had contact to were my maids who bought me food. But I hardly could eat. I was having mixed bag of feelings- I was scared as well as anxious. I wanted to know what was cooking behind these walls.

I would try to get the news from my maid. But they refused to give in any details. I stayed clueless for many days about my future. I spent my days in hope of when sun rays would appear at my door. One fine day, I saw my dad come to my room. I got up excitedly like an overjoyed kid who had got a new toy. But at the same time, I felt pain about what was going to happen. I prayed that every single minute that was going to pass to be a positive one.

“ i am ashamed about what took place. I never expected that you, my obdient child would stab me from behind. I always got you the best things you wished for. What did you give in return ? Pain ! Grief! Disappointment! I am very unhappy with you. I will never forgive you.”, he said, wounding my heart more.

However his words were right. i did wrong. I couldn't control my heart. I blamed myself for whatever I had caused. If and only if i had controlled myself that day, this wouldn’t have happened. I started crying. I didn’t try to defend myself. My dad kept on talking. “ Now what has happened cannot be changed. We , elders have made a decision. ( long pause). We are getting you married next month.”, he said.

I was shocked..shell shocked! I didn’t know how to react.  I was disillusioned. I didn’t whether to be happy or sad. i was neither confused nor did I understand anything. What was happening? Why were we being married. I tried to voice in my opinion. But i knew I didnt have any say into this.

(To be continued)

Consensual -part 7

I couldn’t take it anymore. I felt difficult to breathe. All this was suffocating me. I had to get away. I was in rebel mode. I walked out of the gathering. It wasn’t too far when I felt something pull my hand. I looked behind to see him hold my hand to stop me. His eyes were filled with red flames of anger. It was no longer sea blue.

“Where are you going?”, he asked , holding my hand tight. I felt the pain and tried to free myself. Even though he was skinny, his grip was really strong. “Leave my hand. You are hurting me.”, I said softly. “I won’t leave until you tell me where you going?”, he said stubbornly. I felt the tears rush out of my eyes. I controlled it. “ Why do you want to know? You don’t love me. Why?”, I said, trying not to break down. However my emotion affected my voice.

“Stop creating scene! You think that if you leave, everything will be fine. No! Don’t make me look bad. See, I was never into you. I have been straight with you about my feelings. You don’t know me very well. How can you call this love? Get over it, girl.”, he said.

“I will not go. Leave me alone!”, I screamed. He pulled my hand and dragged me against my wishes. I cried the whole way. We were greeted by our families while dad looked suspiciously quiet. The music had stopped. There were no more friendly chats except for gossip whispers in the crowd. We were in spotlight.

His dad , Shantaram Uncle came close to us and slapped Praveen hard. His cheek was swollen and red. We didn’t understand the commotion and stood stunned. My dad walked out and didn’t say much. Mother pulled me and followed dad. I was still disillusioned by recent episode. What was that? Why were there not talking about it? Did they … No, don’t tell me they got to know about us.

(To be continued)

Consensual-part 6

It was new years eve. I didn’t want to be a part of any celebrations. I wanted to be left alone. But as always I never got chance to voice my desire. I had to come. I was perfect daughter in eyes of my parents.

I sulked the whole time. I made myself invisible amongst the known crowd. I didn’t feel like mingling with people. I felt so small. I couldn’t even leave even if I wanted to. I sat alone looking at people enjoying their time. They were dancing , singing, chatting and playing. Everyone were enjoying except me. Few of them called me to join in, but I wasn’t feeling good. I dismissed their offer politely.

My heart still was beating for him. My eyes searched for him even after he broke my heart so easily. My conscious was secretly scolding me for my indiscretion towards him. How could I let my heartbreaker into my life?

I stopped my search abruptly when I found him. My heart beat increased at alarming rate with excitement. But it stopped when I saw him candidly chatting with one of my cousin, Aarti on whom I intensely loathed.  What did she have  that I didn’t. She wasn’t pretty to look at. She wasn’t articulate either. What made her so different from me? I wouldn’t call myself pretty but I was indeed smarter than her. I could differentiate between A and B unlike her. Maybe it was her sweet talk or her falling on every guy she lay eyes on. 

Whatever her trick was, I prayed Praveen didn’t fall into.

But my prayers didn’t fall into the ears of God. I saw him smiling carelessly at every stupid joke of her. Her bloody PJs! The rumours were right. She had ditched her last boyfriend because he couldn’t afford to tolerate her nonsensical behaviour. Now she was back of my sweetheart. I wish he could see her tricks clearly.

I wanted to barge into their conversation and pull him out. But I couldn’t. Why would he listen to me? I was a kid in his eyes. Oh! How innocent his smile was? It would bring some light in his sea blue eyes. I wish he did that when he was with me. He looked  his best in red tee and baggy pants. I wanted to hug him so bad. Life becomes a miserable bitch when you don’t get what you deserve.

(To be continued)

Consensual - part 5

His expression changed from astonishment to funny one. He laughed like a kid. I stood there , not sure why he was laughing. "Oh my god! Seriously? I don't have any words.", he laughed.

"I didn't understand...", I stammered.  "You wouldn't understand. How will you? You are a kid who believes in fantasy world. This is not love. You are just infatuated, kiddo.", he said.

For a second, I didn't react. It took me few minutes to understand what was happening. My eyes swelled up. I was controlling my emotions. I didn't want to look like a crybaby. I smiled and said, " I know what you mean. I am so dumb that I thought this feeling to be love." He looked at his watch constantly. " I hope you understood what I meant. I have never seen you anything more than just a kid.", he said smoothly.

He left me alone stranded with my emotions. My heart pained. I wanted to cry but I had to control. I locked myself inside my room. These four walls had become my best friend for quite sometime. Somehow it seemed they understood my problems better. I couldn't disclose these heartbreak feelings with my family as they were still in their conventional thinking. I had to bring in my brightest side whenever I was with them.

But I was in serious pain. It had damaged me. I had lost everything that I had. It was difficult for me to cope up with sorrow and grief. More than that it was difficult for me to be different person at different hours. Sometimes I wondered that I may suffer personality disorder.

I couldn't vent my temper on anything. I was burning inside. I had become puppet of my heart. I didn't want to hurt others but in the end I was hurting myself too much.


(To be continued)

Consensual - part 4

"So how's life, kiddo?" , he asked, breaking the silence. Life! It's miserable without him. Well! I couldn't tell that. Why does he keep calling me kiddo. I am not a kid.

"Good! College is over at last.", I said, trying to sound friendly although my voice was too weak to prove that.

"You are free now. You must be having a blast with your friends.", he said excitedly. Enjoyment is nothing without him and friends... I have distanced from them when my heart was not with me. "Dad asked me to assist him with some official work. So I am starting from tomorrow.", I said. "Oh! That's boring. You should enjoy your life more. Work will be there but make fun a part of your life.", he adviced.

I nodded my head as if I was going to introduce fun into my life now. Fun was out of my life for quite sometime. But if he comes into my life, I would get fun back.

As I thought about our equation, a voice screamed inside my head, asking when I would tell him about my hidden feelings. " I ... I had called you that day . You didn't come. I guess you were busy with some work.", I said, hoping that I wasn't rude.

"That day... Oh! I am sorry, love. I was busy with few things and the meeting was out of my mind.", he said, making baby face that he had forgotten about it. "Anyway,you wanted to tell me something!", he added. I was surprised that he remembered at least about what I wanted to meet him for.

I got all my courage to tell him about my true feelings. But my heart ached to tell them. "I.. I..I", I stammered. "What is it, kid? You can tell me freely. I won't bite you.", he said. I mustered the courage to highest level and said with closed eyes, " I love you!" I opened my eyes slowly to see the reactions. My fingers were crossed. I waited for him to speak. He looked stunned. Later he gave his usual charming smile. This confused me. What did that mean? Did he feel the same way as I did?

(To be continued)

Consensual-part 3

I was not myself that day. I closed myself from the whole behind the four walls. I had to deal a lot of emotions and that voice kept pulling me down. Why? Why didn't he come? Did he forget or was it on purpose? I felt an urge to call him. But I controlled it. Who am I to him? Nothing! A girl who was in love with him with no expectations. He was never close to me. We hardly spoke.

I kept to myself for few days. I was distant to everyone though it didn't matter to anyone. Food and water was tasteless to me. I hardly felt like eating. Or I could say I hardly felt.

Few days later I saw the miracle approaching towards home. He was in usual tees and black jeans. The clothes were too lose for his skelton body. He had worst dressing choice. Who could wear faded green shirt with weird wordings? Gross! But his smile was more than enough to turn me into his puppy.

I was in the balcony , observing him walk towards the doorstep. As our eyes met, my cheeks reddened. It felt like the epic scene from Romeo and Juliet where I was Juliet anxious of her Romeo.

I walked downstairs hurriedly. There he was with my dad, talking about how the world and politics have changed. As he looked at me, I felt my skin tingle. My heart was beating fast. My mind became blank.

"Shruti, see who has come here to meet you.", my dad called. I was so glued into him that I didn't hear my name being called. "Hi", I said in faint voice. "Hey! Wassup kiddo!", he said. I sat next to my dad. I didn't speak word. Thanks to my dad! He did most of the talking. I prayed for some work to arrive so that dad could leave and I could have privacy with him.

Why did he call me kiddo? I was not a kid. Am I to him? The phone rang admist of the dad's conversation and my thoughts. I picked it up. It was for dad. I gave him the receiver. While he spoke on the phone, I gazed at my love. I gazed at his eyes, looking for the answer for that day.

" I have some work, kid. Meet you sometime.", dad said. I was overjoyed that he was leaving at last. In fee minutes, he and I were alone in complete silence.

How do I ask him? Should I ask him first? I had no experience in all this stuff. But someone had to do the talking.

(To be continued)

Consensual -part 2

It had been two years since I knew him. But he was still a mystery to me though I continued to love him more day by day.   Everyday I would get to know a new fact about him. I wouldn't lose any opportunity to meet him. But every time I lay my eyes on him, he would be so preoccupied with his surroundings. He would always be in hurry to leave.

I never had the guts to stop him. Why would I? What was I to him? Nothing , just a student who was in love with him.... Puppy love. Did he ever know how much I loved him. Anyway I didn't stop my feeling for him to grow.

I tried all my best to impress him. I wore prettiest dress and look my best. But his eyes never lay on me. He was more interested in his phone. I always hoped it wasn't his girlfriend. In my deepest ocean of my heart, I wished that I was the first girl in his life.

Today was going to be special day for me. I was going to disclose my feelings to my beloved. As every minute passed, I blushed thinking about the time. How did I get courage to speak to him now? I don't know. Maybe it was my friend Abby's love life that induced me to take the step. Maybe it was also his charm that pushed to tell him truth. I didn't want my love story to end up being unrequited love story.

He had right to know what I feel. So one fine day I called him to tell him that I wanted to share something and therefore wanted to meet him. He agreed to meet though he was bit suspicious of the meeting. We decided to meet at an old cafe at today's evening.

Today came so soon. I was excited and took a lot of time to decide on what to wear and what accessories matched the best. I had changed about dozen dresses to come with a perfect chic look. I also rehearsed on what I was to tell him. After making blunders, I came with the lines I would tell him.

I reached on time. But there was no sign of him. I still waited for him . He didn't show up. My heart pained. Voices started mocking at me. They called me dumb to believe him. I tried blocking my mind. I couldn't. I walked out of the cafe with disappointment but still with a hope he would come back.

(To be continued)

Consensual-part 1

 Love happens naturally. Every romantic song I listen takes me to the world where I am close to him. Every movie I watch, I tend to replace the lead  actor to him. Every fantasy I dream of him seems so real. It was fact that I was truly, deeply and madly in love with Praveen. However my mind suspected at times about his feelings for me.

A voice would always reprimanded me that Praveen wasn't into me. But I ignored it. I continued to follow my heart. Two years had passéd and my love for him increased day by day.

How can I forget the day I met him for the first time? It was so special. He was tall and extremly gawky looking guy approached me. He had introduced himself as a guy my dad had asked to tutor me for the subject I hated.

I learnt everything except what I was supposed to learn. It wasn't that he was not a good teacher. He was exceptionally good in what he taught. But I was always engrossed into reading his atestical beauty.

His sea blue eyes were like Ocean in which I wanted to sink inside. He had bright smile that bought life into me. He had innocent charm that seduced me into falling in love with me.

Oh love! What a feeling it is? It makes me so incomplete without him. I wanted to share this sweet feeling with him but I kept my mouth zipped in front of him. I didn't want to let him know what I felt for him because of fear that love was associated- heartbreak

(To be continued)

Love spell -part 10

After thirtieth call, she picked. There was desperate effort in his voice in the other end. He wanted her back. But she knew this was not possible.

"Hi, why ain't you picking my call? You have been ignoring me more lately. If I have done something wrong, please forgive me.", he said. "You have done nothing wrong. Hmmm... How do I explain you? Let's meet. There are things that only I can explain in person. Come and meet at the graveyard next to Old manor street at 6. ", she said.

Time passes so soon when you don't want to. It was already six and she didn't want to meet him. But she had to as today was the only day where
she could practice the spell. He had arrived early than she expected. He did want to meet her. There was a desperate attempt in his eyes to get her back. How much she wanted to explain him that it wasn't true. But there was no time or choice to explain him. Once the spell was used, he wouldn't remember anything and that killed her every time she thought about it.

"Before you or I say anything, I would like to hug u.", she said and hugged him one last time. He hugged her back, not wanting to let her go. After sometime, she forced herself out of his embrace.

" I want you to know that what I am going to do or say isn't going to be easy for both of us. But I have to. I have no choice. I don't want your innocence to be used by anyone of  for mean purposes.", she said. "I don't understand. What are you saying? ... Please don't tell me you are going to break up with me. Don't! I love you.", he said with shocked expression.

"I am sorry!",she cried and used a spell to hypnotise him. Later she made him to drink the juice and she used protection spell. She then put the ring on to his finger and whispered gently into his ear. She quickly left him in his state.

                            *******

Shelly was back to her normal life . Three months had passed smoothly. She made new friends and focused her energies into new activities. Jon left Rosewood without trace. Rumours were that his dad was transferred to other state. Lizzie was disappointed that she couldn't be the queen bee. But that didn't leave her from trying other methods of using the spells to get her way.

                      The end

Love Spell- Part 9

She looked at the list again. She had all resources- oranges, pepper, ginger, amber and rotten apple. She was missing something. She even had the spell that could ward off the love charm from Jon. Ah! The ring.. She had to buy the silver ring and cast a protection spell that would protect him against Lizzie’s evil eyes.

She peered at the silver ring. “ This one is cheapest bargain we can offer.”, the jeweler said.  She thought deeply about whether it was worth to spend her energies into releasing something every girl would cherish. Any girl would be happy at her place. She had the guy of her dreams who was in love with her. After taking huge sigh, she agreed to buy it. She had to get him out of this shit very soon. She didn’t care about being lucky or not. What mattered now was his freedom from this craziness she had gotten him into.

She was walking towards home when she passed the Mysticism shop – one store for all the witches of Rosewood.  She strolled inside the shop. As she looked through what she required for her last spell, she bumped into Lizzie and gang. “ Well! Well! Who do we see here?”, Lizzie mocked.  “ So what are you doing here, miss perfect two shoes?  This place is only for the witches and from what I learn , you are no longer one of us.”, Lizzie continued.

“ I am still a witch until this mess is cleared. You do require someone as your competition. Won’t you get bored with too many followers?”, Shelly gave her back. “ Ha! You… a competition! You are too puny to be a competition for me.”, Lizzie teased. Shelly didn’t reply back. She didn’t wanted to spend her precious time fighting with her.  She hurriedly took the things she wanted and rushed out of the shop.

                                                            ***********

Jon had called her for the fiftieth time. She hadn’t answered. It had been days since she had walked away from him that day. His mind ridiculed him for the wrong things he might have done. But as he travelled into his memory of when he had hurted her, nothing traced out. It was like as if that part of memory had blanked out.

He loved her so much. Why didn’t she understand that? Did she ever love him? Then why did she question his love? He dialed her number one more time , hopelessly expecting she would pick up.

( To be continued)

Love spell-part 8

Shelly was perplexed about what Lizzie said. She would be helping her out with finding the cure. Why? Lizzie wanted this. Was she bored? What was she up to? Questions revolved in her head. “ Why are you doing this, anyway?”, she asked. Lizzie wasn’t startled by her question. She answered her with the truth, 

“Well! Change in the plan! Since I am the head, I get to be his arm candy.” “ It was your idea to try the spell on us. Now all of sudden, you want to be the queen bee.  Ah! Do whatever you feel  like? I am done with this.”, Shelly said, leaving the group that had taken her life.

“ Ha!  See Ms Perfect little shoes leaving the group! You think others would accept you with open hands. Never!!”, Lizzie mocked. “ Don’t you say those words! I am not your pawn anymore. I will never come back even if no one accepts me. I am my own master from now on and don’t belong to any such weird groups. One more thing I would like to say before I leave, I will find the cure and set him free from your spell. I don’t need anybody’s help.”, Shelly replied firmly to her mockery. “Nice farewell speech! Best of luck!” , Lizzie said.

Shelly didn’t turn back and for the first time she smiled brightly. The sun was shining on her way. Bright  days were coming back. But she had to do one last task. She had to find the cure soon before Lizzie finds out.

She hadn’t met him for days. Her heart and soul was focused in finding cure. Every spell she tried, it failed miserably. She spent sleepless nights reading the spell book to find the right cure. All doors were looking closed but she didn’t give up.

It was one of full moon nights when she was browsing the net for a breakthrough. As she read through, she found an old recipe of drink that promised to bring the person back from a witch spell. Everything she tried had promised to do the same, but they had all failed. She thought of using it without any expectation or hope.

(To be continued)

Love Spell-part 7

She was reading her favorite classic – Romeo and Juliet. She dreamed of being Juliet whose Romeo was truly in love with her. Where was her Romeo? Jon wasn’t her Romeo. Indeed he was in love with her but that love wasn’t true. Her heart ached with every minute of realization that her love wasn’t hers. It was a fiction created by her friends and her with a spell. When Lizzie was tired with playing with the spell, she would use the other spell to make him normal.

“ Hey, what are you thinking?”, he asked while brushing few strands of hair from her face. “ Nothing..do you really love me?”, she replied him with a question. “ What kind of question is this? I am in love with you. Truly, deeply and madly!”, he said, emphasizing on the phrase ‘ truly, deeply and madly’. She left him without saying anything. He looked confused with her sudden departure.

He wondered about what he had said that made her leave. He wanted to follow her but his mind stopped him.

She cried her heart out. She couldn’t play this game anymore with her heart. Every time she looked at his eyes, she found nothing in it. This was not love. It was just a fabrication. Every time she tried to tell him the truth, he would rebuff her , telling her that she was simply suspecting their love.  How was she going to make him believe that what he believes is love is nothing but a lie? The only way to get him out was to find a cure.

Lizzie was getting bored with the spell. She got what she wanted. She could finally call herself a witch. But she wasn’t satisfied. There was something missing. Ah yes! She wanted to be the center of all the attention. Shelly had her share. Now she wanted the guy. She hated whenever Shelly was showered with love from him. Shelly would disappoint the poor guy with her cold behaviour. But Lizzie was not going to be like her. She was going to use him for the popularity she wanted. She wanted to take the place of Raven- the queen bee of high school.

Before she could get her plans executed, she had to get Jon. Shelly was key to Jon and getting Shelly on her side was a piece of cake. She knew Shelly wouldn’t mind breaking the spell. She was never into him. Perfect! She had to make Shelly believe that she was going to help her get the cure.

(To be continued)