This shit called Love - Part 11

Love! Oh god! No way! He is sugar candy and not a Prince Charming who would sweep me from my feet. I sat on my bed , pondering at how could I not control this hormone induced emotion while everyone slept peaceful.

It had become routine for me to wake up in middle of night, walk around the house and think about this shit. Love to me was senseless subject that I wanted to stay away .

It was normal day. We had spent first half of the day , goofing around the city. We got back to our adda , tired with little energy to do anything. As I bid him goodbye, he stopped me for a drink.

 We sat on the floor with the movie " Friends with benefits" playing. It was his seventh beer bottle when he said, " I wish I could be friends with benefits with someone. Then relationship wouldn't be so complicated."

I looked at him with gleaming eyes. I didn't want this friends with benefits with him. But somewhere in my heart, I wanted him to hold me with care and affection though it wasn't going to be real,

I got up and told him goodbye. He didn't want me to go. But I couldn't sit there for even a minute due to my emotions bursting out. I reached home where sleepless night greeted me. If I stayed longer , my foolish emotions would weaken my thoughts.

( To be continued)

This shit called Love - Part 10

We became normal again. We ended up doing craziest things till wee hours of the day. The cracks in our relationship soon dissolved. Our friendship was strong and only time could measure the strength of our friendship.

I thought it had ended. But this was only the beginning. I felt strange that I still longed for him to kiss me or touch me the way he did that day. I rebuffed those thoughts many times but they appeared in my mind many times. 

If this was not enough, I felt jealous when he spoke about other girls. I wished he saw me the way he saw his ex girl friend.

Whenever he held me, I shivered. I had never felt this way ever. 

What was happening to me? Why was I becoming like other girls? I  was never so soft or sensitive. Gosh! I felt like Mahi!

I let him have his way and I never did that!

It had been six months since I felt this way. Soft romantic songs became meaningful to me. I always stayed away from this. But now it seemed like as if something was stolen from me.

One blue morning , I realised what had happened to me. All these changes that happened over this few months was nothing but love. A series of mixed emotions hit my heart, soul and mind. "Don't tell me , you are in love!", I wondered. 

( To be continued)

This shit called Love- Part 9

This was a surprise. A kiss! I didn't know how to react. I wanted to release myself from his tight grip. But it was strange! I was enjoying it. While he explored every possible areas of my mouth, I became numb.

When he was done, I rushed for the door. I didn't look back. I ran towards home. I didn't even say our regular goodbyes. This was crazy. The whole night I thought about all the reasons of why he kissed me. Did he have crush on me? 

How could that be possible. He was ditched few days back. We had trashed his ex girlfriend few hours back. My head ached due to too much of pondering . I left the issue. However I didn't meet him for few days. 

I was throwing my tantrums on Mahi and mum. It was wrong on part of me to display my anger on those who weren't the cause of it. He did call me million times. But I ignored it. It took me few days to settle down. 

One fine day ( a week after that incident) I walked into our adda and found him with his guitar and bottle of beer. " Why didn't you see me?", I asked. "What! You stopped taking my calls and you had asked your guard to not let me into your house. Instead of you feeling sorry, you are barking at me.", he replied. 

I never say sorry even if it is my mistake. Instead I force others to say sorry. It sounds weird but it's a fact. " Why should I ? You owe me apology for kissing me?", I protested. " LOL! You never let me say! Ok fine! I am sorry.", he said. "It's not proper. Say it like you mean it!", I said. "Whatever!", he said and left the room. After few mins, he came in and said, " I am sorry. Please can we be friends again."

( To be continued)

This shit called Love- part 8

"Are you fine?", he asked. I nodded with a wink while I cleared my face from dust and dried leaves. "Let me help you ", he said , trying to help me. But I didn't let him.

As we headed towards our usual adda, he  said," You are so adamant! You think riding a bike is child play. It is better for you to listen to people sometimes." I smiled and playfully hit his shoulders.

" Don't start again! You look boring when you give lectures. You should loosen up a bit.", I said. Our adda was small non functional video library that his dad had set up long time ago. The business didn't go well but luck turned gold for his dad and made him top notch director.

The library looked decent and clean from outside. However it was contrast to clean from inside. The broken shelves contained his collections of notorious magazines and videos. The paints of the wall had started to fade. The windows and glass doors of the library were covered with dark papers that hid us from the outside world.

We fell on the grounds like tired bunch of soldiers as we went inside. We cracked jokes at each other. We listened to crazy music playing out from the stereo ( the only new thing in his place). We did all the crazy things that we never thought of during the daylight. 

The day was coming to end and I felt happy that it came to a good end. "What would I do without you!", he said. I smiled and hugged him. As I started to walk towards the door, he grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him. After few minutes , he kissed me deeply. I stood shocked .

( To be continued)

This shit called love - Part 7

I have been like this since the betrayal of my father. While the world turned a blind eye to his miscreants, I didn't forgive him for having another family other than us. 

Mahi was too young to understand what was going. However I pretended as if I didn't know what was going on. Maybe that's why I became a great actress. 

So Rajveer became my family and my so called family became strangers. I don't blame them for ignoring me. I blame us for not doing anything to reduce the distance between us.

"What are you thinking?", Rajveer asked , distracting me from the thoughts about family and love. "Nothing! I thought I would ride the bike today for a change.", I said.

He gave me a weird look. "What! Are you serious?", he said. Before he could react, I had taken his keys and already started the engine. He had no other options but only sit behind me. 

As he sat, I tried to balance the vehicle. After few minutes, we started my crazy fetish of coming up with things. We hadn't crossed even few centimeters, we fell miserably from the bike. Fortunately, the injuries from the fall was not serious.

( To be continued)

This shit called love- Part 6

It was true that I had two sided personality. But I only showed my true colours to Rajveer. Why? I felt free with him while I felt I was being judged by people around me when I was with anyone else.

I sipped the cold coffee while he started pouring his sorrowful stories. I didn't listen. It wasn't that I didn't care . But he never stopped talking about her. " So what do you think?", he asked.

I had only listened to that question while I had ignored the rest of the part. "What?", I asked. " What do you mean what?  I told you everything and wait.. Did you listen to what I said?", he said 

I smiled sheepishly. I squeezed his bony cheeks and he shrieked , "owww! Stop that!" "You want me to say something!", I said. " Dump her in the garbage!  She is not worth thinking about.", I added.

He stared at me with irritated look. " How can you be so cold and unattached? Don't you feel any pain or remorse?", he asked. 

I smiled and said," No! Only weak hearted feel those. I don't care about this shit called love. So forget about her and move on. You will get many chicks."

( To be continued)

This shit called love- Part 5

I was in very bad state. My dress was soiled and torn a bit. I definitely couldn't go home like this. " Hey, You look shit! What do we do now?", he asked. " Sugar candy, why worry when I can do this!" I said. 

I took my dress out slowly. First, I took the salwar out, showing out my cropped top. Later I dropped my kameez which had been covered my toned legs for long time. 

Fortunately no one was there to witness the show except Sugar candy a.k.a Rajveer. Rajveer has been my soul friend since our nursery years. I was three when I first met him. 

I still remember that day when some kid had snatched his tiffin. I walked towards the kid and hit him bad. I got his tiffin back as well as remarks from my teacher to mum. 

I became his guardian after that incident. He had family who were never with him. They always seemed to be scattered due to their work and lifestyle. He never missed his family though I know that deep in his heart , he always wanted to go back home where there was someone who was waiting for.

He looked every corner to see if there was onlookers. " You are mad! What if someone was enjoying the show?", he asked. " Let them, sugar candy!  I have great body to flaunt.", I replied cooly. He nodded his head and said, " No one can ever understand you! You are a girl with two sided personalities." 

(To be continued )