Solitary Love- Part 10

Why? One moment she said she loved him. The other moment she pushed him away. Was he just a toy to play with?  He had mixed bag of emotions flowing inside his heart. He was confused as well as angry.

Why did she show him dreams when all she wanted was to push him anyway? She took him to highest levels of heavenly pleasures and pushed him down. Why? Was this one of the methods of English to bring Indians down?, he wondered.

He had to confront her. He had to know the truth. He was searching for the right moment. He followed her everywhere. But the right moment was yet to come.

One fine day,the moment had come. He grabbed her hand in front of many people. He didn't care of anyone talking behind their backs or sharing their secret to Wilmington . "Tell him that you love me. Why are u doing this to me?

She didn't understand what he said. He looked like a mad man to her. Her conscience scolded her for betraying him. She pushed him back and said, "It's a mistake! Go away!" Willington was quickly given this piece of information. He couldn't take this and thrashed him bad that very night.

He was in pain and so was she. She tossed on the bed the whole night while thinking about him. She had to meet him and see if he was fine. She had to tell him to stay away from her.

(To be continued)

Solitary Love- Part 9

Those three words only  were the only words he had learnt in English. Those three words were the only words that bought joy. Love was mystique that made you believe in heavenly happiness that never existed.

He started dreaming of the future so bright with him and her in fantasy world where there was no place for sadness or loneliness.

They had released themselves from their embrace. They looked at each other with all love. Was it sin to love his Sahib's wife? His heart feared that something bad was looming around their relationship. This was not right. What would happen if Willington found out?

He wanted to express his feelings too. But he didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to say his feelings out in the language she would understand. Words ...language was the villian of their simple yet complex story.

Her heart wanted answer while soul . She knew that it was not right though she wanted it. She was married woman. She was committed to Jack ( Willington). She had made promises in front of God that she would safeguard their relationship. How can she break it up for love?

" You should leave, I am sorry.", she said and left. He was baffled. Why did she leave? Where did she go? Too many surprises didn't go well with him.

(To be continued) 

Solitary Love- Part 8

He was shocked. His body jolted due to her touch. Nobody held him that way. He didn't expect that someone would be greet him with warm welcome during his arrival.

He felt happy deep inside. He knew how miserable he was without her. He hadn't realized that this feeling of pain and now relief was result of love that grew in his heart. 

He had left home because of her. His life had become like barren without her though his source of bread and butter was lost after he was thrown out of his job. Instead of finding other sources,he observed the movement of Willington. As soon as he realized Willington wasn't there in town, he jumped at this opportunity to meet her.

When Willington stepped out of the house, he tiptoed into house. He had to make sure that he wasn't caught red handed. Once he found her alone, he walked slowly to surprise her. But her sudden touch surprised him. He never expected that she would be waiting for him.

Love is blind. He hadn't yet realized that he was deeply in love with her. He still mistook it for friendship until she hugged him. Was her simple touch enough to make him believe he was in love with her? Did she love him the way he did? He wanted to release himself from such thoughts. But what followed next shocked him more.

"I love you!",she said , making his heart jump with joy. So it was love that bought two lonely souls together. His heart relaxed and all doubts of broken heart disappeared in thin air.

(To be continued)

Solitary Love - Part 7

The parties were boring. It was plain. There were the same old things that happened in every gathering.These so called civilized people behaved in typical way.They wore heavy victorian gowns and the civilized men wore trousers. They danced like as if they were some delicate dolls made of glasses. They ate food with polite manners. There was no laughter or fun.

All of this made her heart swell. She didn't enjoy. She became her old soulless self. She missed her new friends. Srinivasan was thrown out of his job that very day when he was found speaking to her. That was last day when she smiled with open hearts. She was lost in herds of civilized crowd.

She tried to ask about him to head servant. He didn't tell anything to her. He wouldn't even look at her in her eyes. After constantly asking him, she lost her hope.

She was losing herself and loathing her life. Everyday parties weren't her thing. She stopped going at once. She sat home knitting sweaters which helped her spend time. However it didn't bring the needed compassion in her life. Her life was cold.

It was usual day. She sat outside, looking at bright outside world. She was comparing her sullen inside self with outside world. It looked like an oasis to her thirsty heart. 

Suddenly she felt someone standing next to her. She looked up to see Srinivasan smiling at her. She jumped and hugged him instantly. There was sudden happiness and hope in her life. He was like the raindrop to her barren soul.

(To be continued)

Solitary Love- Part 6

"Do you sing?", Srinivasan asked. Head servant translated it to her. She nodded and said, "yes and it's the choir.". She started singing. Her voice was beautiful. She missed few beats.

The head servant taught her few words while Srinivasan taught her the simple tunes. She was quick learner. She picked up fast.

It didn't take them many days to teach her the song she wanted to learn. Meanwhile she became good friends with them. She would spend most of her lonely time with them.

Srinivasan's view about English changed slowly. Was she really nice and kind? Was she playing with them like the other English men. His heart wanted to believe that not all English men  were bad and evil. There were few who had golden hearts like her. It is not the human who are bad but their actions that turn them bad. But the fear within him never let him believe this beautiful philosophy.

One fine day, Willington came home to see his wife spending time with the low class gardener. He was shocked. What was going on? What was his wife doing with that animal. He marched towards him and thrashed him. Later he grabbed his wife's hand and walked her to their room.

"What were you doing with that man?", he asked. " I was talking to him. I get lonely, Jack! I need some company.", she replied. "I will introduce you to some group of my friend's wives. You need to spend time with civilized than these filthy people.", he said firmly.

(To be continued)

Solitary Love- Part 5

"Sorry, I got late.", head servant said this nth time now. Srinivasan counted the sorries joblessly while the head servant spoke to her about the deal in her language. He also noticed that she would momentarily gaze at him when she got every moment free.

He stared at her emerald eyes. He had never seen such pretty eyes. Her nose was well shaped, small and pointed. Her lips were red and for one moment, he wanted to kiss them. Suddenly he stopped looking at her and controlled his emotions.

Why did he think like this? She was member of the intruder  clan. He cannot commit sin by thinking about her in such manner. He diverted his mind to music and forms of it.

His love for music was like love he had for plants. The sweet symphony amazed him the way it calms him. The lyrics wandered in his mind like the soul wandering in the forest. He listens to the beats in his heart.

Suddenly he sang the words of love and discussions stops in middle. They listen to him with amazement. When he comes to his senses, he stops. "Why did you stop?", she said.

"Can we start ?" , he looked at head servant. The heart servant guides to them to place where no one visits. They are sitting on the luscious green grass while she is sitting on the cloth mat.


( To be continued)

Solitary Love- Part 4

The day was perfect though it was winter. The sun shined while cold wind blowing across the land momentarily. He had finished his work early to include the new role.

He despised it. Why should he teach the sacred song to the intruder? The land he was standing and the soil that he felt under his feet was snatched by the countrymen of her land and no one cared about it.

He wanted to start a movement like the one started fifty years back by a soldier against British. Unlike the solider, he had no courage. He ended up working for one to support his poor family.

"Good morning! You are early today. Anyway thanks for your time.", she said politely. He didn't understand the language she spoke. Was she insulting him? He had known that the English knew how to treat people ( not superior to their race) miserably. He shouldn't have agreed to the head servant.

Where was the head servant? He made disgusted look. He didn't want to be left alone with this stranger. He looked around while she smiled at him time to time. There was an eerie silence between them.

At last after hundred terrible waiting minutes,the head servant arrived. He huffed and came. After taking few deep breaths to compose himself, he apologized for coming late. Srinivasan understood the value of time for the first time.


( To be continued)